Official Premier League Thread 24/25

Fuck it.

I am putting this here.

It looks like a friendly match between Halifax Wanderers (Canadian Professional League team) vs. Ipswich Town (Under 21) will be hosted here in July. I'm gonna grab some tickets - we don't have any professional football teams here so it will be nice to actually watch something of a bit of value.

Hopefully the support is good and we can land a CPL team in the near future.

thomas tuchel to man united rumour mill on overdrive.

meeting in monaco with sir jim.

make of it what u will.

Seems he's ruled himself out of the race.

WHO THEY GOT LINED UP NOW MURPHS

Ultimately the right way to go for now I think. Clearly he hadn't 'lost the dressing room' like Sky etc. wanted to make out earlier in the season.

I am really interested to see how this one plays out next season.

I suspect a 6th place finish this season.

the offering a new contract bit has me surprised.

an extension after the season they've just had (fa cup aside).

they like paying out contracts these football clubs.

I think it'll turn out that there's a bit more to it than that i.e. his role becomes 'head coach' rather than manager and he doesn't have a veto on transfers anymore & leaves them to someone else etc. so no more £80m purchases on bums he knows from the Dutch league.

jonny evans ain't leaving yet.

1 yr extension signed.

Newcastle has a nice 'easy' five games to the start the season.

Seen West Ham don' leave TCOTU until November I think.

arne slot interview drops at 4.

“The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I suggest you try it.”

250 jobs going at man united.

bet phil jones ain't one of em.

www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/articles/c3grq5w2j55o

Looks like Ten Hag has signed on until 2026

I finally grabbed my tickets for this today. Should be a pretty good friendly and my son is coming along as well.

Haven't seen a live match in about 7 years. 

we do have an everton meltdown thread for stuff like this.

EDDIE THE THREAD NAZI